Today I realise how we have judged the Mother on innumerable occasions. Though in a state of meditation, we became conscious of the Divine in all, beyond all, in the normal state of consciousness, we saw everything in a human way.
Inwardly, one can always be conscious of the Mother being Divine, Adi shakti, Parashakti. All the difficulties came on the level of physical consciousness. The physical mind looked at the Mother with the eyes of an ignorant human being and judged all Her actions from an ordinary human point of view. There was a deep inner conviction that whatever She did, was always inspired by the highest consciousness but the physical mind was blocked. There was as if a thick covering on it through which no light could come in. Even then at times, everything became divine but the experience would not last for long. When one would see the Brahman in all and everywhere, then there was no problem. We were uplifted into a world where there is no problem at all. It is a dream-world of total harmony and beauty. All is truly divine eternally. The disguise of forms falls away. You see the players in their costumes for the drama. It is so strange and unfamiliar to the human consciousness that the physical mind is unable to accept it as real. The difference between the two states of consciousness is so great that they seem to have no connection or bridge between them. There is no transition like white becoming gradually blue or red. These two states would alternate for years and years, sometimes one would be stronger than the other. There was another great difficulty. When one lives in the divine consciousness, one could not really, fully act in the divine way for the physical mind of people would never understand it. Also, when one lives in the physical consciousness, one cannot act in the divine way. It would be an imitation, ineffective, not genuine. With the emergence of the psychic being, most of the violence and folly of the untransformed human nature could be avoided but as long as the physical consciousness is not wholly transformed, there is a double nature – sometimes divine, at other times undivine, even antidivine. As the Divine consciousness transforms the physical consciousness, as one acquires more and more the divine nature, one has to face a new problem. How to live and act in a world which is not conscious of the Divine. Unless one lives in the Divine consciousness, one cannot truly recognise another person living in the divine consciousness. Human beings generally cannot tolerate anyone claiming to live in a higher consciousness. History is a faithful witness of this tragic human feature. Christs big and small have most often been burnt and crucified in all countries throughout the ages. Earth is not yet quite a safe place for the divine beings. One has not to go very far. It is a miracle that the Sri Aurobindo Ashram survived amidst so much murderous opposition. The Mother had to face day in day out our blind ignorance and violent reactions belonging to the ordinary human consciousness. What was really a supreme gesture of Grace, we too often took it as a disgrace. Yet not a single word of reproach came from Her, only a shower of divine love and blessings. The psychic being is so easily covered up with the diabolic upsurge of all the dirt and filth accumulated over ages. Though the Mother always said that She loved all Her children equally, Her children never believed what She said because we all judged Her from our blind point of view. Yet if one lives in the Divine consciousness even for a moment, one realises how absurd and distorted, twisted and dangerously perverted is the human point of view. The Mother is a spiritual Sun emanating constantly the light, power ananda, peace and garmony and the riches of the divine Consciousness. She is partial to none, rejects no one, spreads Her light equally on everyone. It all depends on our receptivity. The more we receive Her, the closer we move to oneness, light and immortality. Her single purpose is to create a divine race. The more one is receptive, the more he is likely to become a spiritual being. The Mother is not far or near according to the ordinary human standards. We can live constantly in Her gracious Presence. It all depends how far we are willing to give up our ego and its incurable blindness. When we live with the Mother, we live in a different world. There are no problems whatsoever. The Mother alone is real. She lives and acts in numberless bodies. It is Her play, Her manifestation, this hairy caterpillar, that majestic swan, this lovely horse, that monstrous tyrant, this bird-loving saint, this blind woman, that murdered child, this pure white lotus are sketches from Her unfathomable mysterious Lila. For Her there is no birth nor death, no going or coming. A single infinite Being, incalculably numerous, ever changing, ever unfolding its hidden marvellous contents through eternity. When the golden lid over the human ignorant mind is removed, then we are admitted into this ineffable Splendour.
Only the Divine Mother can do it if our aspiration is sincere and our surrender perfect.


Niranjan Guha Roy 1993